"It is the decisions you make, when you have no time to make them, that define who you are." What you believe about the world at large and how you fit into the general scheme of things will determine who you are and how you relate to the world you live in. Imagine for a moment little 8 year old Sarah spinning around in front of the mirror in the new pink dress her Mom has just bought her. Excitedly, she rushes in to show her Dad. "Daddy, do you like my new party dress?" she asks breathlessly.
"Sweetheart, you look like a beautiful princess!" replies Dad.
That defining moment in Sarah's life will stay with her forever. With careful nurturing, Sarah will always be able to look in the mirror and see herself as a beautiful woman.
On the other hand, let's look at new recruit Tom who is submitting his weekly sales report to his boss. "Tom, these sales figures are appalling! What are you? Some kind of moron?" Tom returns to his desk totally deflated. His boss has just reinforced the inner voice in Tom's head that constantly tells him he is hopeless; he is a failure; he will never amount to anything. He's heard that same voice his whole life.
What we believe about ourselves is encapsulated in the voice we hear in our head. And what that voice tells us is so powerful it will manifest itself in every action we take, every word we say, and every thought we think.
We are who we believe ourselves to be.
Change the Record Playing
Although the saying has been done to death, the only way to change the record that spins around and around in your head, filling you with negativity, self-doubt and shame is to learn to believe in yourself.
Sure, easier said than done, you say. And yes, it is easy to say "believe in yourself". It's become the cliche for the 21st century.
But who said life was easy anyway?
Anything worth doing requires determination, self-discipline and struggle. Taking the easy route will not land you on easy street!
What is required is a new record to play over and over in your head. Something a little more upbeat, with inspiring lyrics, a great melody and above all, soul.
The great secret to manifesting anything in your life is to re-program the file in your head that says you can't have it.
Nobody else but you has access to the turntable of your mind. And only you have the power to change the recording.
People often ask me why I'm so happy all the time. I tell them the answer is simple: "Because I believe I'm happy and that makes it so!"
It sounds too simplistic to be true, doesn't it? But it's not.
Slice away the "psychobabble", the cliche, the heartfelt fables and cheesy quotations and what remains is the simple, elegant truth: You are who you believe yourself to be.
Belief in Yourself
So what if your mom said you'd never amount to anything? Who cares if the school jock made you feel like a nerd?
What you have to remember is no matter what people have said about you in the past, no matter how much you respected them or how much authority they carried, they are merely people - just like you. People with positive and negative human traits, people who sometimes feel insecure, lost, troubled or alone - just like you.
And even more importantly, whatever has happened in your life to make you doubt yourself is not the "truth". Sure, your self-talk may have taken it on board and made you believe it's "the truth", when, in fact, it's only their "opinion", or an expression of how they feel.
Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
So ask yourself: who do you give consent to in your life to destroy your sense of self-worth? (And that includes you!)
Use these guidelines to change that old record on the player that goes around in your head, and replace it with a melody you can play for the rest of your life.
1. Give yourself unconditional love, you deserve it.
2. Challenge yourself to be better than even you believed possible.
3. Focus on your strengths and work to eliminate or alter your weaknesses.
4. Believe you can become whoever you want to be.
5. Acknowledge that nobody has the power to make you feel inferior.
6. Determine to become a better human being every single day.
7. Acknowledge your achievements and give yourself a silent pat on the back.
8. Smile and remember that everybody has bad days.
9. Embrace the person you are and the contribution you can make to the world.
10. Have faith in yourself and believe you can make a difference.
To believe is to give meaning to your life. To believe in yourself harnesses all your strengths, unlocks your potential and creates a world of endless possibilities.