Session 16: Morning - Choose Love Today

Good morning, my friend, and welcome to Day 6. Over the past five days, we have practiced living in God's presence, listening with the ear of the heart, walking in humility, turning our work into prayer, and carrying the crosses that are already part of our lives. Today, we turn outward. Our focus is community and charity. A person can spend hours praying, reading Scripture, and sitting in silence, but eventually the spiritual life must show itself in the way we treat other people. Monastic life makes this impossible to avoid. A monk does not normally live alone. He lives beside people he did not choose, people with different personalities, habits, strengths, weaknesses, opinions, and ways of doing things. Some become close friends. Others may test his patience. And that is part of the formation. It is relatively easy to imagine ourselves patient when no one is irritating us. It is easy to imagine ourselves generous when no one needs anything from us. It is easy to imagine ourselves loving when we are alone in prayer. Then another person enters the room. Today, we will learn that love is more than a feeling. Love is something we practice. Find a quiet place. Put your phone aside. Sit comfortably. Take a slow breath. [PAUSE - 10 SECONDS] And another. [PAUSE - 10 SECONDS] Bring to mind the people you are likely to encounter today. Family. Friends. Coworkers. Neighbors. Strangers. Difficult people. People you love deeply. Today, they will become part of your monastery.

Love One Another

Our Scripture this morning comes from 1 John 4: “Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God.” Saint John goes even further: “No one has ever seen God. Yet, if we love one another, God remains in us.” Think about what that means. We cannot separate our relationship with God from the way we treat people. Christianity is not simply a private relationship between you and God. If prayer does not gradually make us more loving, more patient, more forgiving, and more compassionate, something is missing. Jesus repeatedly connects love of God with love of neighbor. And He does not limit neighbor to the people we naturally enjoy. That is where love becomes difficult. Almost everyone can love people who are kind to them. Christian charity goes further. It asks how we respond to the impatient person, the difficult relative, the coworker who annoys us, the person who disagrees with us, the person who cannot give us anything in return. Today, pay attention to those encounters because they may become some of your most important moments of prayer.

Five Minutes of Silence

We will now enter five minutes of silence. During the previous days, silence helped us become aware of God's presence, listen, surrender our will, and place our crosses before Christ. Today, let silence prepare your heart to love. Bring one person to mind. It may be someone you love very much. It may be someone you find difficult. Perhaps there is someone you need to forgive. Maybe someone is struggling and needs your attention. Do not spend these five minutes mentally arguing with them or trying to change them. Simply place the person before God. Begin with this prayer: “Lord, help me love this person as You love them.” Then become silent. [SILENCE - 5 MINUTES]

Love Begins With Seeing

Slowly return your attention to where you are. One of the simplest acts of charity is also one of the easiest to overlook: seeing another person. We can move through an entire day surrounded by people without really seeing them. The cashier becomes the person processing our purchase. The waiter becomes the person bringing our food. The employee becomes the person completing a task. The stranger becomes an obstacle in traffic. Even family members can become roles rather than people. Monastic hospitality teaches something different. Every person carries a dignity that does not depend on their usefulness to us. Every person has a story you do not completely know. Every person has fears, disappointments, hopes, wounds, and burdens. Today, try looking at people differently. The person in front of you is not merely part of your day. They are a human being created and loved by God. Sometimes charity begins simply by noticing.

Saint Benedict and Good Zeal

Near the end of the Rule, in Chapter 72, Saint Benedict writes about what he calls the good zeal that monks ought to have. He tells his monks to show respect for one another, patiently bear with each other's weaknesses, compete in obedience to one another, seek what is better for others rather than themselves, and show sincere love. This is an extraordinary picture of community. Notice that Benedict assumes people will have weaknesses. He does not imagine a monastery filled with perfectly agreeable people. Community becomes holy not because everyone is easy to live with, but because people learn how to love one another despite their imperfections. That applies directly to your life. Your family is not perfect. Your friends are not perfect. Your coworkers are not perfect. Your parish is not perfect. And neither are you. If we wait for everyone around us to become easy to love before practicing charity, we will wait forever. The people who test our patience may sometimes become our greatest teachers.

Bearing With Weaknesses

Think about someone whose habits irritate you. Perhaps they talk too much. Maybe they are always late. Perhaps they are disorganized. Maybe they repeat themselves. Perhaps they complain. Maybe they do things much more slowly than you would. Your irritation may sometimes be understandable. But now ask a harder question: What weaknesses do other people patiently bear in me? Perhaps you have habits you barely notice because they are your habits. Maybe you interrupt. Maybe you are impatient. Perhaps you become defensive. Maybe you forget things. Perhaps you complain. Maybe you insist on having things done your way. Humility changes the question from “Why is this person so difficult?” to “How can I love this imperfect person while remembering that they also have to love an imperfect me?” That does not mean tolerating abuse or harmful behavior. Healthy boundaries can be acts of love too. But many of our daily frustrations are not dangerous. They are simply opportunities to practice patience.

Journaling: One Act of Love

Take out your journal or notebook. At the top of the page write: DAY 6 - COMMUNITY AND CHARITY. Underneath it write this question: “How will I show love today?” Choose something specific. Perhaps you will call someone who may be lonely. Maybe you will listen to someone without interrupting. Perhaps you will do something helpful without being asked. Maybe you will forgive a small offense instead of holding onto it. Perhaps you will thank someone whose work you normally overlook. Maybe you will give someone your complete attention for ten minutes. Perhaps you will speak kindly to someone who is difficult. Maybe you will apologize. Maybe you will pray for someone you struggle to like. Choose one concrete act of love. Do not simply write, “I will be nicer.” Make it something you can actually do. Write now. [JOURNALING SILENCE - 3 MINUTES]

The Person Who Interrupts Your Plans

There is another practice I want you to carry through today. Watch what happens when another person interrupts your plans. Maybe someone calls when you are busy. Someone wants to talk when you want silence. Someone needs help when you have other things to do. Our first reaction may be irritation: “I don't have time for this.” Sometimes you genuinely will not have time, and it is perfectly reasonable to say so kindly. But sometimes the interruption may be more important than the schedule. Jesus' ministry is filled with interruptions. People approach Him while He is traveling. They call out to Him. They bring children to Him. They ask for healing. Again and again, Jesus notices the person in front of Him. So when you are interrupted today, before reacting, pause for one breath and ask: “Is this person an interruption, or is this person my opportunity to love right now?”

Closing Prayer

Let us finish our morning in prayer. Heavenly Father, thank You for the people You have placed in my life. Thank You for those who love me, encourage me, challenge me, forgive me, and patiently bear with my weaknesses. Forgive me for the times I become so focused on myself that I fail to see the people around me. Forgive me when I judge quickly, become impatient, hold grudges, or treat another person as an inconvenience. Teach me the charity of Christ. Help me see people rather than simply their faults. Give me patience with their weaknesses and humility about my own. Show me someone I can encourage today. Someone I can serve. Someone I can listen to. Someone I can forgive. Someone who simply needs to know that they matter. When a difficult person crosses my path, help me remember that they too carry burdens I may know nothing about. Give me wisdom to maintain healthy boundaries when necessary, but never allow my heart to become hard. May my love for You become visible in the way I treat the people You place before me today. Amen.


Remain silent for one final minute. Bring to mind the person or act of love you wrote in your journal. Quietly pray: “Lord, give me the opportunity to love today, and help me recognize it when it comes.” [SILENCE - 1 MINUTE] When you are ready, begin your day. Do not wait for some great opportunity to love. Look for the small ones. Listen. Encourage. Forgive. Help. Be patient. Notice the person standing in front of you. Today, your home, workplace, neighborhood, and family become your monastery, and the people around you become part of your spiritual formation. We will meet again at midday, when we will explore how charity begins in the heart before it ever reaches our hands.